This poem, which I recently stumbled across on the Internet, really captures the essence of what it's like to live in a house full of boys. I can relate to so many of the example given - the fireman raincoat, obsession with superheroes and construction trucks, icky smells and bathroom sounds that make little boys gigle, a fascination with nose picking, piles of laundry, eating habits that resemble that of a barnyard animal, bedtime stories about firetrucks and dinosaurs...little boys sure know how to live life to the fullest!
Boys In My House
Author: Erin Jo Kilmer
There are boys in my house – and Spiderman shoes
And 200 papers in various blues.
There's Bob (he's a builder) and Thomas the Train,
There's a fireman coat to wear in the rain.
They have cars on their shirts and frogs on their hats
There's a glove and a ball and a red plastic bat.
There's dirt on a face and a smudge on a nose;
Grass stains on knees and sand between toes.
There's bathtime at night with bodies to scrub,
And when we're all done there is dirt in the tub!
There's bandaids and bruises and curious bumps,
There's smiles and laughter and sometimes there's grumps.
There's odors most icky; there's boogers so green
There's more yucky things than I'll ever get clean.
There's piles of laundry; there's stories at night;
There's bedtime and bathtime and dinnertime fights.
There's cars and there's trains and there's books about trucks
There's Scoop, Lofty, Dizzy, and Travis, and Muck.
Sometimes there are bugs, and sometimes there are frogs;
Sometimes they are lions, or dinos, or dogs.
There are cute little vests and darling neckties
Dragged right through the mud – oh what a surprise!
There's running and climbing and jumping and falling
And laughing and crying and hugging and brawling
And rolling and losing and finding and creeping
And whining and stealing and sometimes there's sleeping.
There's tantrums and time outs and extra loud noise –
There's love in my house shaped like two little boys.
***
On that note, here are two recent "Ryanisms" that provide a brief glimpse into what life is like in our "house of blues" - certainly a far cry from "sugar and spice and everything nice!"
Losers for Breakfast
Frequently during lunch, Ryan likes to role play scenes from the Disney movie, Cars. He insists on being Lightening McQueen and I pretend to be Mater. (On a side note, I do a pretty lame impression of Larry the Cable Guy, the voice of Mater, but Ryan is always tickled by my hillbilly twang!) Since I'm usually feeding Gavin at the same time, Ryan will often improvise and ask me, "Mater, do you like baby food?" My standard reply is, "Shoot, no, I like tow truck food." Then I ask him, "McQueen, do you like baby food?" Usually, he just repeats what I previously said. Recently, however, he replied, "Nope, I only eat race car food." When I questioned, "what exactly is race car food," he matter-of-factly answered, "losers for breakfast!" (For those of you less familiar with Cars, "I eat losers for breakfast," is the opening line of the movie.)
It's Your Choice
Superheroes are Ryan's interest (obsession) du jour. First it was trains and firetrucks, then pirates followed by cars, and now superheroes. Naturally, once I get up to speed on a particular topic, Ryan decides it's time to move on. I must admit, I was completely unprepared and ill-equipped for my sudden entry into the world of superheroes and villains. I naively assumed Batman, Superman, and Spiderman were the only costumed crime fighters. Oh no, there's Aquaman, Beast, Doctor Strange, Ghost Rider, Thing, Captain America, and Wolverine, just to name a few. And those are just the "good guys." It is a bit unsettling to hear my sweet, innocent little boy talking about fighting and shooting and "bad" guys. What happened to the days of Winnie the Pooh and Mickey Mouse?! But, in an effort to connect with him on his turf (a lesson I learned from the book,
The Mom You're Meant To Be, that my moms group is reading), I've tried to learn the lingo, constructed bat caves out of diaper boxes, and staged car chases and bank robberies. However, Mike and I have created a few villains - Mr. Freeze, Mrs. Piggyface and The Tickle Monster - who are significantly less violent, evil, and threatening then the likes of the Joker, Red Skull, and Dr. Doom. Our villains wreck havoc by prolonging winter and dropping 50 inches of snow, not sharing candy, and cutting in line at the ice cream store, respectively. In our minds, this allows us to teach Ryan life lessons and good manners while still doing something he's interested in and enjoys (i.e., "connecting on his turf"). After that lengthy introduction, here's a story about a recent conversation I overheard between Ryan and Mike:
Mike promised Ryan that if he were well behaved while running errands, then he'd play with him when they returned home. After they finished putting away the groceries, I heard Ryan say, "Daddy, it's your last chance. Let's play Batman; you can be Galactus." Mike replied, "let's play something else. Why don't we play Cars?" Ryan insisted that he wanted to play superheroes and again suggested that Mike assume the role of Galactus. When Mike complained that he didn't want to always be the bad guy, Ryan declared, "Alright, Daddy, it's your last chance. It's your choice, you can be Galactus, or you can go to time out!"